You may be wondering where I’ve been the last few days. Well, I’ve been buying myself a few new toys.

Two of my hobbies are music and fantasizing about what I will buy when I win the Powerball lottery. My visions for my millionaire future usually revolve around a huge house, and in the basement of that house will be a wet bar. With a big-screen TV, a pool table, and a stage. And the stage would be set up with equipment for me and my musical friends to play anytime we want.

As it is, I can’t afford a giant TV or a pool table. My current house’s basement isn’t finished. It doesn’t have heat, electrical outlets, or even a level floor, so a pool table is a bad idea right now anyway.

But the other day Alicia and I went to Drums Etc. (which is right around the corner from where I live, hint) to pick up some guitar strings for her, and I saw that nice amp. Their price was very good. And as I thought about it, well, why not have it now? I don’t have a stage, but I probably never will. That shouldn’t stop me from acquiring some equipment, if the deal is good, right?

So now, in addition to my 3 guitars, I have a set-up that’s good enough for public performance (not that that’s my ambition). It’s not “recording quality”, but it sounds pretty damn good. Better than I expected, actually.

I feel kinda funny about it. I enjoy it for myself, which is all that matters, I guess. But there is something that seems vain and indulgent about buying a microphone system for personal use. I feel sheepish about admitting I bought the stuff. Having a home studio is something that you expect from Moby or Ani DiFranco, sure, but me? Why should I have one? I suck. I have no doubt that Simon Cowell would tell me that I am the worst thing he’s ever heard (wasn’t it nice of the universe to organize all the worst singers in successive descending order so that Simon can say that every time?) . I can carry a tune and, with extensive practice, not embarrass myself. But nobody is clamoring for my voice to be amplified.

I am looking at it as expensive toys. Adult toys are expensive. I know guys that spend thousands of dollars on cars, boats, or hunting. If I want some musical equipment, why not? And if I’m gonna get it, and I can afford it, why not get the real stuff? I didn’t spend that much (don’t believe the suggested prices you see on the web).

Yeah, yeah. Whatever, Gerry. A microphone. Who do you think you are?