So I’ve been having trouble with my car insurance company. We know that. But this week I’ve also had to deal with my dental insurance company.

I know I’m lucky to even have dental insurance. A lot of people don’t. And I don’t really pay that much for it, so I should be grateful. But the concept of dental insurance is pretty simple. I submit a bill, they pay it. Easy, right? You’d think so.

I submitted a claim in January. This month, in March, I received a “Notice of Payment”. Not a check, mind you, just a notice. I didn’t understand the form… the numbers didn’t seem to add up. But I do know that I never received a check. So I decided to give them a call.

“Hi, this is Gerry. I have a question”

“Could I have your Social Security number?”

Uh, sure. ###-##-#####. I was wondering…”

“Your birth date?”

Shouldn’t they have that? “August, 29 19##. You see…”

“Could I have you phone number?”

“Yeah, ###-###-####. But…”

“How can I help you?”

“Uh, yeah, I have a question about a claim. You see, I received a Notice of Payment…”

“What is that date of action?”

“Um, O.K. Uh… 01/14/04.”

“Hold, please.”

Hold music

“Mr. Gerry?”

“Yes.”

“I’ve found your claim. It’s right here. It seems that no one has processed it.”

Advantage: Gerry.

“Not processed?”

“Yes. I’ll submit it for processing now. You should receive your money in about two weeks.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t understand. Maybe you could help me by explaining. You have the claim, but it’s sat, unprocessed, for two months?”

“Yes.”

“Is that normal?”

“No, that shouldn’t have happened. I don’t even know how you received a ‘Notice of Payment’ form.”

“I see… So, do you have any suggestions on how we can keep this from happening again in the future?”

long pause

“Um, no.”

“I see. Well, what happened, you see, is that my dentist offers a discount if you pay at the time of service. So I did that, and then had them submit the claim on my behalf. Should I have not paid the bill, and let them wait for payment from you?”

“No. I don’t think they would have been paid either.”

I see. And I understand that I’m giving you a hard time, but I’m just trying to figure out what I can do to keep this from happening again.”

“Nothing.”

“O.K. Great. Thanks! I look forward to receiving my check.”

I turns out that I have a second job, and it’s calling insurance companies and making sure that they’re doing their jobs.