So… update time. What’s been going on? Well there’s been no progress on the car repairs. My insurance company continues to drag its feet. I made a bunch of call this morning to try and light a fire under some asses, but to no avail. Apparently the claim agent I spoke to the day of the accident neglected to note in the file that the car was undrivable. So they haven’t been in a hurry, or informed me of my options, because they assumed that the car was in service.

I corrected that oversight.

Apparently I could have had the thing towed to a “service first” shop who could have begun repairs right away. But since it’s been sitting somewhere else for almost a week, I feel sort of obligated to have the work done there. Because I said that I would. Oh well, this place is more convenient for me. It will just take longer.

Hopefully this whole incident will be behind me in another week or two.

I’ve also had reason to deal with my gas company over the last week. These two incidents have made me ponder our new so-called “service economy”. Remember our old economy? Remember how much better the service was? Humans answered the phone. Companies tried to satisfy customers. Now that we have voice mail, faxes, Email, and what should be a competitive climate due to a soft economy, customer service should be the fastest and friendliest it has ever been, right?

It isn’t, is it?

What happened?

Is it because a “service economy” has really made service a commodity? Really… what is the best kind of service? When as little service as possible is needed, right? Call with a question, get an answer. Can’t make any money that way, though. Gotta sell a phone system that will keep people on hold for 10 minutes to tell them how important their call is. I know my call’s fucking important! It’s important to me! You say it’s important to you, but if it was, you’d answer the goddamn phone, wouldn’t ya? So what you really mean is that my money is important to you, and you’d really appreciate it if I would hold until you can free up a representative to take it from me.

You want to save me money by matching me with a calling plan that fits my unique needs? Why don’t you just charge less for everything? Oh, guess you’re not really interested in saving your customers money. It looks like what you’re really interested in is seeing exactly just how much money each customer is willing to pay, and then charging them that much.

It used to be that when I took my car in for service, I’d take it to whomever was at the desk, explain the problem, and they would fix it. Now there’s a specific person I should talk to because he’s been assigned to me personally (based upon the section of the alphabet into which my name falls), and he heads a team of mechanics that specializes in my car. So now, not just anyone can help me, and I have to wait until my team is free. All in the name of improved service. In fact this service is so good, that it has a name: “Five Star Service”. And when I bought my car I was invited to a seminar where they explained how good their service was, and how to avail yourself of it.

Funny… the old kind of service, the kind without a name, didn’t require an explanation.

And don’t even get me started on how long it takes to get your fast food now.

By the time this “service-based economy” matures, everyone will spend all their time “servicing” other people by making them wait in line, while they’re on hold on their cell phone, trying to leave a message to have someone call them back and tell them how to contact their personal “customer-first” representative. On weekdays, between 9 am and 4:30 pm, except for Mondays and national holidays. Because you’re important to us.

Of course this accident will cost me my $500 deductible. If I had known that, I wouldn’t have bought myself this new toy two days earlier:

Yeah, it’s only a Squier, but it’s a special edition, gorgeous, butterscotch-blonde. It looks just like a wood Brach’s candy. Pick-ups and other parts can be upgraded. For $199, I couldn’t beat it. I’m going to sell my maroon Ibanez Roadstar II. I never liked the color, and I never use the whammy bar. The Telecaster is more authentic to the stuff I play, anyway.

So Paris Hilton was thrown off a horse, eh?

In his defense, the horse said he didn’t really feel anything on his back, and thought no one was riding him. He was spooked when he heard a voice coming from up there.

The horse then reportedly stepped on her stomach. Her doctor thanked the horse for locating the small, under-used organ.

But Paris is fine.

“I’m so glad to hear it. America almost lost a beloved celebrity. That was a close one. She’s a true hero”, said a relieved Christopher Reeves.

You know, it’s been a tough week. But it can’t be all bad when you can pick on Paris Hilton and Christopher Reeves in the same joke.