I've been listening to these arguments against gay marriage on the radio, and I keep hearing people trying to make the case that allowing gays to marry is going to be bad for the institution of marriage. Then today it occurred to me that there may be something to this... not the institution thing, that's silly. But an increase in marriage between homosexuals is going to significantly devalue another segment of our population.

Single people.

Who works late and on weekends so that you married people can spend time with the spouse and/or kids that will throw snits if you come home late just one more time? And who picks up the slack when you can’t come in to work because that same spouse/child is sick?

That's right, single people.

At least while the homosexuals were not officially married, they were, by default, single. Oh sure, maybe they were in a committed relationship, but hey, you can work this weekend, right? 'Cause you're not married.

Who is it that buys your wedding gifts, effectively furnishing your house for you in return for being invited to a party that we wouldn't normally go to, for which we have to buy special clothes we wouldn't normally wear?

Us single people.

You know, I'd appreciate a rabbit wine opener, a whole new set of service for eight, or matching appliances, but unless I can find someone to drag down the aisle with me, forget it. The more homosexual friends I had was that many less weddings I would ever have to attend. Now that's out. And can you imagine a gay wedding? They're not going to register at WalMart. Oh, no. They'll probably want matching Kate Spade messenger bags! What's that going to cost ya?

And married couples are always trying to include their single friends in their expensive plans. "Oh, do come along to New York this weekend. We're going to Althezar's for dinner! It won't be any fun without you..." No, thanks. All my money is tied up in healthcare, housing, and food, all of which I have to pay for, clean, and prepare all by myself.

Yep, after this all dies down, the last group of second class citizens is going to be single people.

Well, us and Christians. It’s still O.K. to make fun of them.